At the minute the “gaining weight is cool” movement is circulating through the fitness and body positivity community like wildfire, and I love it. Because gaining weight is hands down the coolest thing I’ve ever done. It’s allowed me to eat whatever I want, go out for meals without having a mini breakdown both before and after and most of all it’s allowed me to enjoy my life regardless of what the number on the scale says. And contrary to my belief that gaining weight would make me miserable, at my highest weight I am a million times happier – and healthier – than I ever was when I was 28 pounds lighter. Oh and I also have tonnes more energy, better skin and hair, and seem to have acquired some boobs. So y’know, I’m pretty content.
I heard a couple of women talking in the gym the other day about how they’d really let themselves go over Christmas. Translation: they stopped caring about losing weight for a couple of weeks because they were too busy enjoying their lives. It got me thinking a lot about the concept of letting yourself go, and I have come to the indisputable conclusion that letting yourself go is actually one of the greatest things you can achieve.
Looking at the right hand side photograph above, 3 years ago (probably even one year ago) I would have definitely asked myself how on earth I let myself go so much. Where are my abs? Where did those belly rolls come from? And don’t even get me started on those tree trunk legs … (yes, I have been told this, and I have also been told that they would look better if they had less muscle. FU.) Being afraid to let yourself go is telling yourself that there’s a part of you that needs to be contained, the part that wants pizza or ice cream or the part that asks you to sloth out on the sofa because you’re exhausted. But what letting yourself go really means is finding freedom. Instead, we live our lives abiding by these rules that we’ve made for ourselves and in the process we lose our intuition.
We think if we keep this tight leash on ourselves, we can control our lives and the world around us. Control is rooted in fear. It was only when I finally let go of my control around food and exercise that I realised something – I was never the one in control. They were the ones controlling me.
Only when you let yourself go do you truly become yourself. You find the freedom your body has always craved and you learn to tune into your intuition. This might come with a few extra pounds or an extra belly roll or two but so what? Is that really the worst thing that could happen in your life?
Live your life, love yourself and let yourself go.
Lots and lots and lots of love,